Wednesday, July 8, 2009


Uranus is the planet of the unexpected. Uranus points to where we rebel. Uranus, quirkily enough, also rules insanity. (When badly aspected) I understood Uranus with 2 keywords, purpose and genius.
Whatever talents you may have are ruled by Uranus, and I call that important. Sometimes we are so used to being ourselves we don't understand that we have a gift at all. A genius doesn't know they are a genius until they finally come to understand that other people can't do the stuff they can, or they are taking much longer to get to the same conclusion. Sometimes, you just don't know. Everyone is a genius at something, and sometimes it isn't so easy to figure out what that something is. Stephen King started writing and no one was jumping up & down and calling him a genius, we had to find him through a circuitous route and now we recognize him. Maybe you are a great organizer or a great mother or a talented conversationalist or someone who makes other people feel good about themselves. You have a purpose and you have a talent. For most of us, this is the same thing.
For me I have to reach for it and work for it. For some of us it doesn't come easily. Once upon a time I thought that if you had a talent you just did something without having to work at it. I was wrong.
I have to write to reach my writing talent. I have to stop mid-work and sometimes mid-sentence and think hard about what it is I'm reaching for. In my tweens and teens I wrote millions of poems for myself. I would write something and then later try to figure out what it meant. It is just that way for me. Understanding comes after I've written something out of the blue that doesn't make sense and then I make it make sense. I wonder sometimes if anyone else does this, or if I'm as rare as a ghost orchid after they've built the malls and gas stations. People go through miles of dangerous mucky swamp to see this rare flower bloom. They say it glows. To me writing is like that, you've tried and tried and at the end you have something rare and of value only because it is beautiful. It's not supposed to glow but it does. It is worth more than the sweat and tears you've shed to get there. To me, the goal is to know.
Some people may have the goal in life to be noticed. Some may want to be important. Some may want to spend idle hours at some seashore working on the perfect tan. Some may want to be well thought of by others, my hubby wants this. I want to know things. There is nothing I want to gain from knowing, I just want to know. I want to know secret things, I want to know every thought someone thinks and exactly what they think about all the time! I've always felt the stain of being different, freakish, outside the norm. I think that is why I have something to contribute as a writer, because I've dug deep for secrets. I dug with some vague hope that I could reinvent myself to be like everyone else. I would learn to talk as everyone did, and do the things that everyone else did and in so doing fool everyone into thinking I was part of the group and not an outcast. I could make myself normal.
It didn't work but on the way I've realized I am not so different. Where I am different is the huge amount of thinking and studying I've done of people. Things happened to me to make me different that were beyond my control and now it's done. I'm me. This is what I focused on. This is my Uranus. My Uranus is this private study of people and the many meanings of words. If you use a word differently it suprises you and throws you off track. It is how poems work. Books work in much the same way, you want to know what will happen as the words disappear and you allow yourself to forget the fiction, the cleverness of the writer, the sleight of hand of the magician, and let yourself forget that it is not real. They call this suspension of reality. Still I think fiction is more real than reality, I'm adding here as a sidenote. Fiction writers often have very good memories and huge chunks of novels are literal truth. The people just have different names. I've come to learn this as I've studied writers along with what they wrote. The very best writers can make you forget you are reading at all, with simple words. They say, cut the adverbs on all the writing sites. They mean for you to achieve this leaness of prose, to imitate what successful writers do. I maintain that these writers probably just wrote first and asked questions later. Stephen King has said he didn't articulate how he wrote for years. Still I am told that writing is something that you can learn how to do, but I cannot fathom anyone taking that much time at writing unless they loved it. It's impossible. Writing requires so much, Mr. King says it is like crossing the Atlantic in a bathtub.
How do you express your talent? The answer is supposed to be the Sign your Uranus is in. Mine happens to be in Leo. Leo happens to be very important in a chart, Leo is ruled by the Sun and the Sun represents us. Leo is where the vitality of the Sun is. Leo is our inner child, here is where we play. My talent is in fun and there it has always remained. I know it is different for other people but somehow I can't grasp this fact. If I am not having fun then work is like a trip to the dentist. Ask any of my former employers. If I am at all sick or even slightly unwell I find it tremendously difficult to work. Even the mildest of marital spats has left me unable to write at all, which makes me highly agreeable to my husband. When I am happy I will graciously work until I drop, I'm sort of unreliable though. I find that I must be optomistic or I shall soon die. I must always think the future contains great & wonderful things. If I become bitter at life I will be as difficult to be with as a person who has just quit smoking & craves a cigarette. I must think in a certain way. My chart is mostly fire, and fire represents inspiration. Leo is the sign of show business and is dramatic and so is my writing. This, I believe is my talent and my purpose.
Uranus rules the unexpected, and I'm told that I obtain luck through change. When Uranus is powerful you can expect the unexpected. Because Uranus is in my 9th house of long distance travel I am lucky in faraway places and foreign lands. Everyone has luck, all of us would like a clue as to where to find ours.

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